My Made to Crave Journey DAY 1

I am reading Made to Crave: Satisfying your Greatest Desires with God, Not Food by Lysa TerKeurst. Lysa is the president of Proverbs 31 ministries. 


In her book, Lysa says, "There was a time when I felt utterly defeated in the area of food and health. I knew that I needed to make changes not because of the number on the scale or what clothing size I was. I knew it because of the battle that raged in my heart. I craved, I desired, I thought about, and arranged my life around food."  This is why Lysa wrote her book. She wrote her book for every woman who feels the way that she does, and after only two chapters, I have been sucked in, and I truly believe that every woman should read this book. We were made to crave, but we were made to crave GOD not FOOD!


For the next 21 days, I will read, pray, and examine the desires of my heart.. As I read, I will blog. I am going to be real, open, raw. I am going to write things that I have never spoken out loud. These are things that I've kept hidden in the back corners of my heart; too ashamed to let anyone else find out. 
Afterall, I am a good Christian girl, leader of Bible studies and prayer groups, teacher of Sunday school and Kindergarten, etc. etc, etc.... More importantly, I am a lover of Jesus. I do love him, so why do I crave other things more than I crave him? Because if I am completely honest with myself, many times, I crave those fries drenched in cheese and bacon  or that peanut butter pie, more than I crave Jesus. 


I have als kept these thoughts, feelings, and weaknesses hidden, because I have been afraid of what other people will say. "Natalie, your weight is fine. You don 't need to lose weight." (It's not about my weight.) "Does God really care about what you eat?" (God doesn't want us to crave anything more than we crave him, so yes, he does care very much). "How can you make your unhealthy eating habits something Biblical?" (uh hum, didn't sin begin with Eve choosing to EAT the forbidden fruit, AND read Matthew 19, thinking of food in place of money . . God does not want us to crave ANYTHING more than we crave Him, and he calls us to give up ANYTHING that we love more than Him!)


In her book, Lysa says, "One day I looked up the definition of the word indulge, which means “unrestrained action.” And for me, it was unrestrained eating. You see, eating in its proper context is not the problem. God gave us food for nourishment, strength, and even celebration. But when pleasure becomes unrestrained, there’s a problem." As Lysa was honest in her book, I will be honest here. Why do I make tortilla chips, guacamole, and cheese dip my comfort? Ice cream and pizza my joy? Fast food my reward for a long, hard day? Why do I long for these things more than I long for God?


This is a battle that I have fought in my heart for the past five years, at least. I have eaten unhealthy, felt guilty, stressed about these unhealthy choices, vowed to do better, counted calories, exercised more, felt better about myself, eaten unhealthy again, felt, guilty, stressed, and the cycle has gone on and on and on .. . I have become obsessed with food, diets, exercise, etc. I have turned to food, more than I turned to God, and this is something that I want to change. I cannot do it without God and I cannot do it without support. I need accountability in this area.


I know without a doubt that God is challenging me to surrender this, my issues with food to his control, and I also know that this will not be an easy task. 


Lysa closes Day 1 with the following quote, "The process of getting healthy has to be about more than just losing weight and focusing on ourselves. It’s not about adjusting our diets and hoping for good physical results. It’s about recalibrating our souls so that we want to change for the right reasons. I’ve realized that a healthy eating plan can be one of the most significant spiritual journeys I’d ever dared to take with God. As you join me for the next twenty days, I hope you soon say the same thing!"


Join me? 
Pray for me? 
Pray with me?
Walk alongside me? 
Keep me accountable?


Thanks for being a part of this journey with me.